They were about to kill me

My 1yo will be baptized this weekend at East End United Methodist. What a marvelous occasion. And we are so blessed that many friends and family are coming to join us for the weekend to help celebrate. What started out as a one-hour church service, of course, has morphed into a four-day extravaganza/hysteria.

• There are the children to entertain/prevent from having tantrums, of course.
• There are the relatives to feed/nuture their psychological issues.
• There’s me to enjoy the festivities/try not to have a breakdown in the midst of the chaos/family fun.

Actually we are all looking forward to the time together. With relatives flung across the Eastern United States, it takes a major holiday or an event like this to bring us together. And I have an Excel spreadsheet that outlines where 30 people are going to be on Sunday and where my family is eating and sleeping the end of this week. I may not be a "planner," at least according to my sisters and mother, but I was raised by one. (Mom, this is where I’d link to your blog, if you had one.)

And I am excited about all of that. I have been thinking for several days about what to serve for different meals. You have to know this one thing about me. If company’s coming, I’m not making something I’ve ever made before. It’s like a sickness I have. (I say that about a lot of things, don’t I?) But really, it’s true. It’s not even like I think about it consciously anymore. When I started thinking about what to make for this coming Friday night’s dinner, I just naturally pulled out a cookbook I’ve never cracked before. That was automatically the right one. And I think I’ve found something that my father (really, it’s better with meat in it), NYC sister (no red meat, no white grains, healthy fare only please), Nashvegas sister (must have meat!) will all enjoy. I don’t have to plan around my mother or the kids. (7yo eats yogurt and chicken; how can you plan around that?….1yo eats everything, bless him.)

Saturday night for some reason had me screwed up from the start. My 7yo wanted to grill out. Fine. Yesterday my mom said, "Your dad and I will bring steaks." I thought that was a great idea. The more I thought about it, though, the more I realized that was only half the entree. We had a vegetarian joining us. And some kids probably wouldn’t eat steak. So add hot dogs and veggie burgers. Then NYC sister calls. And I realized the other problem. NYC sister hasn’t eaten red meat or hot dogs in years. Years, people. I said, "You can eat a veggie burger, right?"

NYC sister: "Well…"

I then proceeded to lose it. This did not fit on the spreadsheet. This is why spreadsheets and planning are bad. This is why I do not plan. Plans don’t work out. It’s better to see who’s at your house at 5 p.m. and see what’s in the freezer. It’s worked for me up til now.

I think NYC sister is still speaking to me.

Today, I told Nashvegas sister about our conversation and explained the good news: The vegetarian is not coming. (It’s not really good news, party wise. I am sad about that family’s not coming. But it was simplifying dinner.) And about how I had been getting fairly irrational over the grill issues with NYC sister.

Here’s the best news: Nashvegas sister left me a voice mail tonight. She and my mother have appointed themselves in charge of dinner Saturday night. Hmmm. What else can I have a panic attack about?

:) Thanks, y’all!!